Television: Grow the Fuck up

Television is a dying breed. While many will disagree with this statement and start listing off the countless new television shows which dominate our cable lines and satellite air waves - shows like Supernanny which depicts the abomination of parenthood in our society juxtaposed with this permeating trend of “I have a British accent, therefore my ideas are valid”; innane shit like Hell's Kitchen and its even more disturbing spin off series Kitchen Nightmares; and shows which force us to watch, otherwise normal (though, that's debateable), people dump their heads in barrels full of spider monkeys while eating coagulated blood balls wrapped in the skin of an ox's testicle only so that we can ask, 'why would people do that to themselves?'. The simple, though not very satisfying, response to this would be that the reason these shows exist is because people watch them. This is a very clean and capitalist response suggesting a clear relationship between supply and demand. Well, this is simply a flawed argument, I should think. It automatically begs the question of, 'how could we have started watching these if it weren't for an initial interest in them?' I'm not one for religious arguments suggesting prime movers, but it sure as hell seems as though there might be a case for such an argument when looking at our choice of television programming. The obvious conclusion to this would be mainstream media. They obviously control the news we see on which stations, be it right wing propaganda, left wing liberalism or just completely center agnostic assholes with no opinions but the opinion to tell us that opinions are useless. Why shouldn't it be clear to realise that these same corporate assholes would control the kinds of television programs pumped into our televisions?

While the above is an interesting enough topic in itself for an extended article (one which I might eventually do down the road), it is, in fact, not the crux of my current argument, though it is related. If we agree (and for the sake of argument, we will for the moment) that the viewers are in fact not to blame for the choice of programming on television today and that it is explicitly controled by a group of corporations (CBS, NBC, etc). Why, then, are we presented with this slew of 'reality' (a term used to define shows which have no bearing on reality anyway) television with the constant need to censor every second word? Just because you bleep out the word on television does not mean that the meaning of that word is not still expressed. We see this same pervasive obsession with cleanliness when it comes to the written language. Just because I add a couple of asterix's to the word 'f**k' does not mean that people don't automatically associate that retarded looking word with 'fuck'. It's insulting and it's useless. I know these people are swearing, so I should be allowed to hear it for what it is. If mainstream media was so concerned about the sanctity of language as a way to preserve the innocence of children by preventing them from becomming uncivlized brutes, then they wouldn't be putting these shows on prime time television anyway! But because they decide to do so, there is only one conclusion to draw from this. They don't give a fuck about the sanctity of language.

And when are people who watch television – ie; the entire fucking population – going to stand up and say in a resounding bellow, 'grow the fuck up!'. Television is so incredibly behind the times of censorship, it's not even funny. Cinema made the jump in the 50s and 60s as they started abandoning the strict social constructs around 'obscene' behaviour; swearing is now not only accepted in contemporary cinema, it's targeted towards teenagers. New box office hits such as Superbad, while technically rated R, are acted by and meant to appeal to teenagers in a society who have little to no problem with words like 'pussy-farts', 'ass-fucking', 'tit-fucking' and every derivative thereof. Literature has evolved into an art form reserved not only for the rich, aristocratic tight asses of the pre-victorian but for authors of the lay people. People who don't need three degrees in English literature or have the title 'sir' or 'lord' before their name can now write about the intricate techniques of rolling, smoking, snorting, pushing, pumping, injecting and inserting of various drugs in various orifices of a person's body. It would seem as though mainstream media's attempt at protecting the youth from bad language has failed a miserable and embarasing existence as role models. With a track record as horrendous and appaling as that of television, I think it's about time it gave up its reign on the distribution of popular ideas in society and take up a more fitting role as janitor. However, instead of cleaning up other people's putrid diarrhea, they should focus on amending their attempts at brain-washing entire generations of people's minds into believing what they want you to believe. Grow the f**k up already.